Is My Wife Cheating On Me?


I got this email from a friend recently, he clearly has a big decision to make, and I didn’t feel qualified to answer his question for him, so with his permission, I have published his email on here. Please give your answers in the comments section.

Dean, I really need some advice on what could be one of the most dramatic decisions I’ve ever made in my life. I suspect that my wife has been cheating on me for some time now…

So far it’s the usual warning flags… the caller hangs up if I answer the phone when it rings.

My woman has been “going out with the girls” much more lately but when I ask their names she just says, “Some friends from work you don’t know yet.”

I stay up late to look for the taxi bringing her home, but she always walks down the drive as if she has gotten out of the car round the corner, since I can hear a car somewhere. I really think she’s isn’t arriving by taxi…

Once I picked up her cell phone to see what time it was and she went crazy and told me that I should never touch her phone again and got all defensive about “why was I checking up on her?”

You can see I’m nervous to bring up the subject with my wife because I think deep down I’m not sure I want to admit truth, but last night she went out again and I decided to get to the bottom of things.

I decided to hide out near the bushes in the front yard so I could get a good view of the whole street when she came home. It was at that moment, sitting in the bushes with my wireless laptop, that I decided my PC is too damn slow and needs an update.

So should I finally start using Windows Vista or do you think I should keep using XP?

  • dave

    Doesn’t really matter which OS you use. You will be amazed at how fast that computer will fly when you throw it at her lover’s car when he drives by!

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  • Renegade Conservatory Guy


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  • Dean Hunt


    nice one Dave.


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  • Ian

    Give your wife a machine with Vista; she will spend more time in – waiting in anticipation for something to happen.

    Microsoft says Vista doesn’t work so they are bringing you windows 7 windows 7

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  • mark

    I just love it!

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  • Joanne

    You might THINK this looks like a software problem.

    But consider the hardware —

    My husband just got this really big, fast hard drive and now we have no problems.

    Good luck, friend of Dean.

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  • tyler

    wat da…… hahahaha..

    a friggin great twist!

    i was wonderin why he was hiding in the bush, and stil havin his laptop with him…

    so is this another one of your posts that you planned to make it go viral?

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  • Mrinal Bose


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  • Guru Crusher

    You need to Keep Vista. Should also invest in a webcam, so that you can just set that bad boy up in your window, or hide down the street with it for Irrefutable Evidence.

    Plus, XP i heard doesn’t do well with webcams and video. It has flaws, that XP still does not have. This way you can capture her movements flawlessly!

    - Coty Schwabe

    PS. Maybe you should get Windows Mojave! ;-)

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  • Guru Crusher

    Messed up earlier. I meant to say you should keep XP, not Vista…

    My bad.

    -10 points of intelligence….

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  • dimas

    Ja ja ja, very funny.

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  • Alexandre de Oliveira

    haha, very good!

    wait Windows 7…

    p.s. by the way, if she has a lover, whose fault is this? the lover for being a man or your friend for not being a man enough?

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  • Mark

    The objective realization you are experiencing is that it is time to switch to Macintosh. Once you go mac, you never go back.

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  • Dean Hunt

    “Once you go mac, you never go back.”

    Best comment ever.

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  • Thomas Gray

    Howdy Dean,

    Hopefully your question is serious (although what a copy of an old joke there Dean) :P

    Anyway, the choice between XP and Vista is user preference, both have their short comings.

    If your Laptop is older rather than newer, I would recommend sticking with XP. If it is a newer laptop, and it’s specs are above: 1.8 Dual core, 2GB RAM & 80GB HDD then move to vista (if you want to).

    The main problem with Vista, is that Microsoft are stopping support for it, and extending support for XP by another 3 years.

    My choice?

    XP/Ubuntu – Dual boot. The “Best of both worlds” approach. At work I spend half my day on Linux, and the other half on windows. I find that there are features in Linux that I absolutely love, and now can’t do without, and the same is true with XP.

    But anyway. I digress.

    Stick with XP. Clean up your HDD (yes that means loosing your no doubt extensive collection of pornography) and if you don’t feel confident about clearing it, bring it to Microworld in Harrogate and I will sort you out..

    For a modest fee..

    Based on income..


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  • Dean Hunt


    It was of course a joke… but I am sure your comment will assist people.


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  • Ian

    Hiding behind a bush and keeping the blog going needs speed. You will amaze her with your speed if you choose a machine that has one of the new mother boards from the worlds #1 Asus. Time to boot 5secs, internet & mail instantly available and windows of any flavour isn’t needed to get you there.

    This makes MS sad, and is the reason for windows 7. They need to stop everyone including your wife from leaving them.

    It appears that having no delay to your boot time is highly pleasurable.

    For years your wife has led you believe that the slow sluggish pretty face of Vista fulfilled her desire, when in the end what she needed was lots of regular instant gratification.

    The Asus also will enhance battery life allowing for more quick fixes on the move.

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  • Eurphoria

    I would hold on to XP for right now. You can get Vista when you are ready for a new computer. Or you can consider a Mac.

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  • suzymiller

    Well I am qualified to comment as I am putting on the UK’s first divorce fair this Spring, and what I say is:
    Go for a collaborative and ethical approach. Open Source – Ubuntu operating system based on Linux is what will provide long term happiness and security. Good luck.

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  • Craig Dewe

    It doesn’t matter… either operating system will work fine for

    Just make sure he uses good virus protection.

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  • khan

    hilarious! ha ha ha ha ha
    at first i really thought it was a real thing dude!

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  • Resources for marketers

    ROFLMAO Good one!

    Might consider updating to an APPLE MAC instead… I hear ‘APPLES’ work better with gravity. Much better when he chucks it at the lovers car as the first commenter suggested :)

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  • funny

    funny dude!

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  • M.d Tabish Faraz


    I was also wondering why the guy took his laptop with him to the bushes.

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  • Affiliate Marketing Ebooks

    Keep using XP!

    Funny stuff, Dean!

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  • Greg

    OS. SCHMO-S. He need to run one of those ultrs-lite laptops as one can throw them much farther and with greater accuracy.

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  • jetkev

    Maybe you shouldn’t stick your finger on Windows XP or Vista too often. Then she might come back.

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  • Benjamin

    There are definite signs of cheating here and they need to be looked into. I would advise you to do some digging and find a creative way to try to catch her in the act.

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  • Liz

    Actually, I think that you should discard PCs completely. Get a MAC.

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  • JonIsHere

    Well, they say 40% of married women have had a fling…so…oh well. Any best of luck Friend

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