Hi, my name is Dean Hunt, and in the past month alone I have had lots of new relationships…

Heck, I had over 20 this past weekend, one with a Samurai called Shane, and one with a married couple… oh, and how could I forget the slick guy from Poland?!?

Now, before you light your pitchforks and cast sin upon me… I should stress, I am talking about business relationships here.

You see, I passionately believe that the best way a small business owner or entrepreneur can grow their business FAST… is through relationships.

Let’s start by looking at some of the ways a relationship can help you in business, and then we will look at some of the tricks and mistakes that people make when it comes to this powerful art and science.

Why Should You Give a Damn About Relationships in Your Business?

There are too many benefits to list… but here are a few to get you started:

* Sell more stuff

* Great for brainstorming, advice, masterminds etc

* Speaking invites

* Webinar invites

* Co-product creation

* Strategic referrals

* Trusted recommendations

* New business opportunities

* Building your brand

Those are just a few, there are literally hundreds more…

But the truth of the matter is that building relationships is not a “what’s in it for me” mentality… this is where most people go wrong… so let’s look at some of the DO’s and DONT’s of relationships in business.

DO = Push your comfort zone.

Are you nervous about going to a networking event? Are you scared to pick up the phone? Then this is exactly what you should do… “money is where the fear is”… trust me, it gets easier, and is well worth it.

DON’T = Focus on yourself.

Imagine speaking to someone and then bombarding them with stories about yourself… what have you gained from that? What have you learned from it? Chances are, very little… so focus your attention and conversation to the other person.

PS: I am guilty of making this mistake, but I am actively working on it… it is hard because my stories are so awesome. haha

DO = Have a system to store your relationships.

Unless you are the rainman, chances are that you will not be able to remember the names and contact details of everyone you meet…  personally use HighRiseHQ to store my contacts… an old school folder is fine, as is a spreadsheet.

DON’T = Try and get married on a first date.

I see people make this mistake all the time… basically, this means that people try and close the deal before they have even started to build a REAL connection…

I don’t want to promote your product when I don’t even know your name!!!

DO = Follow-up…

I am sure we are all guilty of making a great first impression and then going years without speaking again… you have done the hard part, so make sure you follow-up regularly.

DON’T = Only focus your time and energy on the “A-listers”

Many of my close friends and connections come from speaking to attendees at events, not just the speakers. Don’t be a fame whore.

DO = Be a “Trust Bridge”.

I have to credit my friend Chris Diagle for this term… Chris is business development manager for Ryan Deiss, and we recently spoke about the value of being a trust bridge…

This basically is the act of introducing two people to each other who can mutually benefit from that connection.

As a middle man, or “trust bridge” you are saying that both parties are cool, and well worth connecting with. I do this often, and ask for nothing in return… how can you be a trust bridge in your industry?

SUMMARY

The relationships and people side of the industry are not areas that get discussed often enough in my humble opinion… and as someone who was rather introverted as a child, I believe there is a science to this art.

If you would like me to discuss this side of things further, ranging from rapport building, influence, networking like a pro, getting speaking gigs, finding promoters for your products or services, how to fascinate people, or even how to use Facebook to build great relationships without Facebook using you and your time… please comment below.

Enjoy, and remember, behind every great business is a great person.. so go say hi.

Dean

 
PS: Comment on this blog post and I will name my first child after you.

Ok, I need your opinion on something… please read through the following, and then comment below with your opinion.

I am always up for a new challenge and adventure… however, I have a few wacky new ideas, and need some help filtering the duds from the gems.

Below is a short pitch for each idea, simply comment on this post with your thoughts on which (if any) you like.

POSSIBLY AWESOME (POTENTIALLY TERRIBLE) IDEA #1: “Dean’s Daily Dose”

The pitch: A daily video blog (or vlog, as the cool kids call it), where I share a tip, piece of wisdom, observation, rant etc… the vids will be a max of 3 minutes long.

Further info: I am a big believer in “Enter-trainment”, meaning, learning should be fun… so I have a couple of recurring ideas that could be built into the show intro to make it potentially amusing.

Possible flaws: History suggests that my passion for projects can diminish pretty quickly… so committing to a daily show, may be a dangerous move.

POSSIBLY AWESOME (POTENTIALLY TERRIBLE) IDEA #2: “The 100 Webinar Challenge”

The Pitch: 100 LIVE webinars in 100 days… a test of focus, determination, and fatigue. Here is the twist though… I would document the behind the scenes journey… my challenges, highs and lows, struggles, successes, tips and more… it is like Jackass crossed with a Bear Grylls-esque survival type show for the business world.

Additional info: I would do a mixture of one of my webinar trainings to other people’s audience, and host for really inspiring and informative experts to my audience. The hard part here is not so much the actual 100×90 min of webinars, it is everything else that goes into it… for example, finding 100 joint venture partners alone is quite a challenge, not to mention the admin, accounting and fulfillment afterwards. I could consider getting a sponsor for the experiment, who would be briefly mentioned at the start of each webinar.

Possible flaws: Again, 100 days is a long time for someone who tends to be rather impatient at times. I would have to ensure that the behind the scenes, diary type information was engaging… and I don’t know if the challenge is shocking/gripping enough.

POSSIBLY AWESOME (POTENTIALLY TERRIBLE) IDEA #3: “Rapid Webinars”

The Pitch: Kinda like webinars meets speed dating… one of the problems with webinars is that they can be too long and dull at times… so what if I did webinars with proven experts that were a max of 30 minutes long? A 60 sec timer for their intro, so they don’t go on about themselves for too long, and then a 2 min timer at the end for their soft pitch.

Additional info: All webinars would be live, all killer, no filler.

Possible flaws: I don’t know how interested the experts would be with this… 30 mins really isn’t a lot of time. But the time constraints could really make it an interesting experiment.

POSSIBLY AWESOME (POTENTIALLY TERRIBLE) IDEA #4: “MentorX”

The Pitch: I take one of my training products, and each month I partner with a different mentor, and follow the strategies, systems and methods that they advise. Each mentor gets a share of my profits, each gets to put their signature on my business… which mentor will I make the most money with? What lessons and secrets will I learn? What really goes on behind the scenes?

Additional info: I would of course document my progress with each mentor, perhaps with a daily video or blog post… all the lessons learned will be shared, all mistakes revealed, all numbers and profits shared too…

Possible flaws: I am well connected in the industry, but convincing proven experts to spend time with me each and every day for an entire month may be tricky… by offering a % of sales, they may come around, but I really don’t know. Also, everyone has different backend systems and tools, and so there may be technological challenges that arise with this.

So there we go, some of my latest weird ideas… what are your thoughts? Which are the best/worst, and why?

I really appreciate your input.

Dean

PS: If you have any ideas of your own, I would be open to hearing them… webinars are my focus, so I try where possible to build webinars into the idea…. but I am open to most things.

Before you turn away in disgust, I should point out that the title of this blog post is merely an analogy (or metaphor) I can never figure out which is which…  to a mistake that I see happening EVERY single day in the business world.

In a nutshell, I see people trying to pitch someone on an idea, phone call, joint venture deal etc… before they have even begun to build a relationship with that person.

It makes me cringe, so I decided to do something about it and share a few tips, mindset shifts, and strategies to help ensure you never look like a selfish, greedy, son of a gun.

RULE 1: Don’t try and sleep with someone on a first date

ME: oh look, I have a new Facebook friend request, let’s check it out…
THEM: “Hi there, will you promote my product?”
ME: wow, pitching me on a Facebook friend request… that is low. *DELETE/BLOCK*

The moral of this gripping tale is to get to know someone first… build a real relationship/friendship first. Think of what you would do on a first date… you would get to know them, be nice, listen, be helpful and friendly, etc… the same rules apply.

RULE 2: The personal touch is essential

If I had a dollar for every time I get an email that starts with “Dear webmaster” or “Dear sir/madam”… I would have enough dollars to build an army of zombie robots to go out and do my bidding.

Er, anyway… world domination aside, here is the moral of this zombie apocalyptic tale… if you don’t even know my name or my sex, then what on earth makes you so confident that we are a good match to do business together?!?

Also, people are not idiots… we have red flags in our mind that have been trained over many years, and we can spot spam, bots and “throw crap against the wall and see what sticks” type methods a mile off.

So if you are sending friend requests or emails, it should address the person by name… this takes no time at all, yet makes a huge difference… this basically tells people that you are not just cutting and pasting, or mass emailing.

RULE 3: Fun is the new black

Are you looking for strategic connections, affiliate partners, business opportunities etc on sites like Facebook or Twitter? Well here’s the thing: Most people use social media when they are bored… they will rarely admit it, but we all know it is true.

So if you are trying to connect with new people, it will go a long way if you can be fun, interesting, entertaining…. you don’t have to try to be a comedian, but if you can make someone feel better after reading your update than before they read it, you are on the right track.

RULE 4: Find the win/win and negotiation is easy

At the risk of feeling the wrath of the “tired old business cliche committee” I offer up this little nugget: “Most people’s problem is that they are constantly tuned into WIIFM” (What’s In It For Me).

A deal or project where there is equal benefit to both parties is a much easier deal to close. It is your job therefore to focus on ensuring that a) there IS a benefit to both parties b) The focus is less on you, and more on them.

If you disagree with the above, then I have a lawn you can come and mow.

RULE 5: Don’t de-value yourself

Perception can often be reality, especially on the Internet… so always be wary of lowering your perceive value/authority.

Let’s go back to the dating world, which is quite apt, as the concept of de-valuing one’s self is a core principle in the underground world of PUA (Pick-UP Artists).

GUY: “Oh my god, you are so beautiful, I can’t believe someone like you would even be talking with someone like me”

Can you see why, although kinda cute and honest, this would not go down well if you were to say this to someone you just met?

I don’t want to dive too deep into this area, but we make snap judgements in our mind all the time, we all do it, even though it is socially unacceptable to admit we do.

My friend Ryan Lee just wrote a nice blog post about people asking to “pick his brains“, and he made some great points.

However, some of the tips he gives include:

* Buying the expert a cup of coffee
* Working for them for free

While I am sure this can be used to get an initial introduction with an expert, it also starts you off on the wrong foot in my opinion.

Sure, you will notice the person who is blatantly kissing your ass with free coffee, but are you likely to want to do business with them?

My good friend and mentor James Schramko once shared a little trick at one of his events… he said that when the audience get photos with the speakers, they should remove their attendee name tags from around their neck for the photo….

If you can see why that is smart advice, then great, if you can’t, then you may well be “that guy or gal”.

SUMMARY

Despite everything I said above, relationships, connections and rapport should ideally be a natural, unforced, and certainly not a rule or tactics based thing… but hopefully the above will give you some ideas or insights into the world of social interaction, joint venture deals and relationships.

Have a great day.

Dean

PS: Want to comment, say hi, or argue about this post? Here is my Facebook Like Page.

I don’t know whether to laugh or cry…

Do you have a website that gets traffic but is not making the money you hoped for?

If so, you NEED to read my story.

I met a guy at an event a while back, and he has made millions of dollars online, so naturally, I got him drunk and then bombarded him with questions

He agreed to look at one of my sites, that was getting regular search engine traffic, but was making next to no revenue.

Here is where things get really interesting…

He says that the traffic that I am getting (most of which I thought was worthless), should be netting me between $3,000 – $5,000 per MONTH.

Best of all… he got hands on, and did all the work for me.

A quick bit of calculation showed that I have left over $180,000 on the table in the past few years, and I thought it was WORTHLESS.

Damn!!!

So why am I sharing this story?

Well, he may be able to do the same for you.

If you have a website that gets a minimum of 250 visitors per month, then go answer these few questions right now –> Here ya go.

I even made a video for him… go watch it now and admire my slide creation skills. haha

I will post updates in the coming weeks.

Dean

PS: I can’t promise he can help you all, nor would he have the time to, so be quick.

If you want to learn a new skill it is important to know the 4 key stages we ALL have to go through to become awesome! Do you recognize them?